The Night Before Kindergarten

Tomorrow you start school.

My brain is bouncing between feeling unprepared and feeling even more unprepared. The closest I can get to this feeling is when I was waiting to meet you. I had everything checked off the list, but there was this lingering "how am I going to do this" feeling.

I did it. We did it.

How are we going to do this?

I'm sure the morning will be calm (HA). You'll be cranky per usual morning routine. I will try to act excited and unemotional. You seem to thrive on not making it a big deal so I'll continue to say it's not a big deal. You've done all these things before. Thank God for daycare.

I'll turn in your paperwork. Inevitably, I'll forget something. I'll try to forgive myself.

I have this image of you walking into your classroom for the very first time alone. I picture your tiny tennis shoes and your confident shoulders strutting down the hallway and into that classroom with ease and a dash of shyness. You'll sit at your table. You'll do what your told. You'll respect the rules and boundaries. You'll be a good student. I know you will, but this feels like I'm letting a piece of us go. It's a good piece...a necessary piece.

You're going to own kindergarten and I'll be standing there on the curb as your biggest fan tied for first with your father.